What does success even mean?

What does success look like to you?

Feeling stuck? Like in the mud of your life?

A fancy car? An Armani suit coupled with Calvin Klein underwear? Perhaps a mansion in the safest gated community you can think of? Or are you one of those that prefer the simpler things in life like peace, nature, hell for an aesthetic I'll include a big old farm with green grass and a fireplace to catch up with your family. What about standard car that you paid off recently?

Does success mean you landed your dream job at 25 and married at 27 like you were advised to do so because it was the "timeline of life" that needed to be adhered to (God forbid you deterred). Do you feel successful because you married once and only once? Do you feel successful because you had kids one year after marriage (everything in working order I see) or because you started that business right after graduation with your business degree? (Kudos man)

If you have all of the above then that's amazing! Congratulations on your definition of the word success. You have achieved your life expectations and you should have the largest glass of wine known to man. Well done! With that said, please don't make the poor, spouse-less, child-less, matric certified (or not), one bed room flat portion of the population feel less than anyone or anything. Found your dream job in one interview? Well done! That's terrific and I'm sure it took alot of work getting yourself to that level. There are other people who don't have that same sentiment. I don't encourage self pity however being a victim of this I have to put my hand up here.. how'd you guys do it? Like how?

There's people that marry their high school sweetheart and there's people that have to go through a cricket team to find their soul mate- it's ok girl, we don't judge! There's people married for 10 years that just didn't conceive a baby and others that are in grade 11 pushing out twins (guess their parts work just fine). I know I have been plagued by the baby question. It's actually quite annoying and intrusive. There's people that study right after matric thinking they will be better off and after 5 years watch the class drop out drive a GTI (not kidding). Your peers open up business after business and you just wonder "what in the world am I doing with my life?" You go on this vicious tirade of evaluating your life and your goals and objectives that you so carefully wrote down that never came into fruition (don’t panic if you don’t have a list).

Guys, if you feel unsuccessful, know this... it's all about timing. It's all about the timing that is meant for you. Also, don't base what you see (fancy lifestyle with the Versace and the Dolce) as a sign of SUCCESS. Most successful people never brag... they move in silence. Ever saw Steve Jobs branded from head to toe.. nope. If I can be honest with you success to me means something that nobody can take away from me even if they tried for instance my reputation, my peace, my patience... my husband. Lol. To me success means you did things the right way. Nobody was hurt in the making of this success- kind of thing. I feel like people in this new age feel the need to step on others on the way up and sure it lasts for a little while but it will fade. There's absolutely no substitute for hard work. You can kiss ass as much as you want but it will never make you smarter, stronger, braver or more successful.

Didn't go to university after grade 12 because of whatever reason- that's cool, there's other options out there now. You just got to find them and learn new trades that fit what you can do. Studied engineering at 19 but now you work in sales- that's ok, it's a stepping stone for your next move, just keep pushing. Married and divorced by 25- slow down babe, maybe it's time for introspection and learn about yourself. Take this time to make yourself happy. Married at 28 with no kids- defective parts, return to sender (just kidding). That's ok. Maybe you and your partner need some time before the roaring cries of parenthood consume your life. Started a business and its not going your way- chin up, dude you came this far... you can do this, you just have to keep striving for your dream. You don't have your own house yet? Our little secret, most homes belong to the bank anyway and it becomes yours after like a 100 years!

My point guys, is simple. Success means different things to different people. I can't compare my life to Catherine's life because our lives are completely different. She grew up rich with drug dealer parents and now she's a successful opium dealer. Anyway, you get my drift. Don't compare your "time" with Catherine's "time".

We are all going to win. Just not at the same time. Nobody hits the ribbon at the end of the sprint at once. You need wait your turn honey, just like at home affairs. We don't pay R100 to get in front like others. Work hard. Be truthful to who you are and always do everything in an ethical manner. Don’t be fooled by the weird, quick success of others... you should actually run from those ones... they sound like a Catherine.

Are you feeling stuck? Comment and let's talk!